Trivia and Quotes
Quotes
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White Bitch: Behold, my white castle.
[she points to a White Castle restaurant across from them]
Edward: White Castle? I feel like I`ve been there before.
Willy: Who wants to play with Willy?
Peter: I want flabby grandma arms!
[as the White Queen pulls up in her turbo sled]
Edward: Whoa, Stifler`s mom!
Lucy: Holy shit, a talking beaver!
Willy: Children, do you wanna know what makes all my candy taste so special?
Edward: Uh-huh.
Willy: It`s a special secret ingredient. It`s real human parts. There`s gonna be a little itty bitty piece of each and every one of you inside of the yummy yum candy, literally.
Edward: A chocolate river! Mmm! Mmm! Chocolate! Hahahaha!
Willy: That`s actually the sewer line.
Peter: [Talking about the frozen White Bitch] We will create a democratic society, and give her a fair trail, and...
Captain Jack Swallows: [Jack Swallows come rolling by on the wodden wheel and runs over the Bitch]
[In the distance]
Captain Jack Swallows: Take that, Bitch!
Peter: [pauses] Ah, screw her anyways.
Lucy: I`m sorry, was the fight over?
Kanye West Look-Alike: [while Lucy is viewing the camera from Mr. Tumnus] The White Bitch doesn`t care about black people.
Peter: We have something the White Bitch doesn`t.
Lucy: Perky breasts?
Edward: [in his old age] Chuck Norris rules.
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: I have had it with these goddamn snakes on this goddamn plane!
Susan: Oh, I know, please help!
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: I have had it with these goddamn snakes on this goddamn plane!
Susan: I know...
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: I have had it with these goddamn snakes on this goddamn plane!
Susan: Why do you keep saying that?
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: Because internet bloggers love when I say, "I have had it with these goddamn snakes on this goddamn plane!"
Susan: Why are you yelling?
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: Shut up, bitch! I`m always yelling! I`m Samuel Goddamn Jackson!
Susan: [Shocked] Bitch?
["Samuel Jackson" grabs Susan and throws her from the plane]
[first lines]
Narrator: This is the story of four orphans brought together by fate. They didn`t know it yet, but there was something more greater in store for them, something epic.
Lauren Conrad: Nice hair, Rogue.
[Peter removes his jacket and wing straps]
Cyclops: He`s unleashing his powers!
Storm: He`s gonna spread angel wings!
[Peter clucks like a chicken and turns around showing his small-sized wings on his back]
Mystique: More like chicken wings!
Magneto: Break it up. Break it up. You all know Peter is too much of a pussy to stand up for himself.
Silas: [to White Bitch, in subtitles] Beat me like Bobby beats Whitney! Allegedly.
Susan: Welcome! My name is Harry Potter!
Lucy: Aren`t you a little old to be still a student here?
Susan: Nonsense. I am but 14.
White Bitch: This crystal will finally put an end to the resistance. I will start a series of earthquakes that will collapse all of Gnarnia and grow a new continent where only I and my followers will live.
Bink: Yo, Bitch, that`s pretty much the plot of Superman Returns.
White Bitch: Pretty much, yeah.
White Bitch: [holding crystal] Let`s start things off with a bang, shall we?
Edward: But you`ll kill millions.
White Bitch: Billions. Come on. Let me hear you say it.
Edward: My family will stop you!
White Bitch: WRONG!
Magneto: We`ll stand behind you, Peter. That bitch has threatened our mutant way of life for too long. We believe in you.
Bink: [stabs Edward] Take that, Kumar!
Silas: [to Aslo] I`m gonna go Jackie Chan on your ass!
Harry Beaver: May I present the kings and queens of Gnarnia! Peter the Heroic. Susan the Just. Edward the Loyal. And Lucy the Dumb Shit.
Peter: [while urinating in the snow] Look! Nicole Richie!
[camera shows a stick figure with hair]
[last lines]
Borat: Jagshemash! You did it! You make moviefilm have happy ending.
[Captain Jack Swallows comes on his wheel and runs Lucy, Peter, Susan and Edward over]
Borat: NOT!
Nacho Libre: NACHO... cheese Doritos are delicious!
White Bitch: God, I hate those fuckin` kids
Peter: Badonkadonk.
Peter: Monobrow! Monobrow!
[clapping excitably]
Peter: King wants a monobrow!
Susan: [Lucy is cleaning doorknob] What are you doing?
Lucy: Willy told me he wanted his knob polished.
Susan: Dumbass.
Peter: We may not have the numbers on our side or the weapons she possesses, but we have something far more powerful.
Lucy: Perky breasts?
Ashton Kutcher Look-Alike: Yeah! We just punked Edward. *Shwam!* That was awesome.
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: [From unrated version] Enough is enough! I`ve had it! With these motherfuckin` snakes on this motherfuckin` plane!
Susan: So have I!
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: Enough is Enough! I`ve had it! With these motherfuckin` snakes on this motherfuckin` plane!
Susan: Right...
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: I`ve had it! With these motherfuckin` snakes on this motherfuckin` plane!
Susan: Why do you keep saying that?
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: Because internet bloggers love it when I say "I`ve had it! With these motherfuckin` snakes on this motherfuckin` plane!"
Susan: Alright, we get it already. Okay?
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: No! I don`t think you do! I`ve had it! With these motherfuckin` snakes on this motherfuckin` plane!
Susan: Why are you yelling?
Samuel Jackson Look-Alike: Shit, bitch! I`m ALWAYS yellin`! I`m Samuel motherfuckin` Jackson!
Susan: Bitch?
[Gets thrown off the plane]
Peter: [From unrated version]
[as Superman, Peter is shot in the eye by a thug]
Peter: Oh my god! You shot me in the fucking eye! Oh, that really hurt! Why would you do that? That was so unneccesary!
[backs up and falls off of roof]
Silas: [In a Subtitle] I`m gonna go Jackie Chan on Yo Ass!
Aslo: ARRRRRRGH!
[the Camera Starts Pin-Pointing on Aslo as a Subtitle appears]
Aslo: Great News, I just saved a bunch of Money on My Car Insurance!
Silas: [In a Subtitle before Shooting Mr.Tumnus Dead] I`m Rick James, Bitch!
Trivia
The band playing at the big party sequence is Eagles of Death Metal.
#
# Edward is the only character whose name differs from the original character from The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (2005). The original character`s name is Edmund, not Edward.
Roscoe Lee Browne`s last film.
Crispin Glover plays Willy, a spoof of Johnny Depp`s portrayal of Willy Wonka in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005). Glover and Depp previously worked together on two films; What`s Eating Gilbert Grape (1993) and Dead Man (1995).
Not screened for critics.
When the White Bitch is on her Myspace page, it says she is listening to Fall Out Boy.
When Edward sees White Bitch for the first time, he says "Stifler`s Mom". This is a reference to Jennifer Coolidge`s role in American Pie (1999).
Crispin Glover`s line "I can`t do that" while introducing the factory to the four orphans is said in the same tone and posture as he does in Back to the Future (1985) when asked to invite Lorraine to the ball.
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