Frank Zappa - Dong Work For Yuda

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Music Video

Song Lyrics

Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals)
Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals)
Ike Willis (lead vocals)
Peter Wolf (keyboards)
Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals)
Ed Mann (percussion)
Vinnie Colaiuta (drums)

Central Scrutinizer:
Hello there...this is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... Joe was sent to a special prison where they keep all the other criminals from the music business...you know...the ones who get caught...it`s a horrible place, painted all green on the inside, where musicians and former executives take turns snorting detergent and plooking each other...

(As the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER chuckles to himself for a moment, FATHER RILEY, who became BUDDY JONES, steps into view in his new identity: FATHER RILEY B. JONES, Prison Chaplain, who, in a rather heavy-handed piece of imagery, is now entrusted with the job of singing this song as he assists the captured executives in their quest for new meat to plook, and, once having found these victims for the princes of the industry, trades them little blobs of sanctified lubricant jelly for cigarettes and candy bars while he holds them down so the execs won`t have to work too hard when they stick it in.)

...Anyway, listen, while he`s in there he meets this guy who used to be a promo man for a major record company, named Bald-Headed John... King of the Plookers...

Father Riley B. Jones:
This is the story `bout
Bald-Headed John

Former Execs:
Dong work for Yuda,
Dong, Dong

Father Riley B. Jones:
He talks a lot `n` it`s
usually wrong

Former Execs:
Dong work for Yuda,
Dong, Dong

Father Riley B. Jones:
He said Dong
was Wong,
`N Wong was Kong
`N Dong work for
Yuda,
`N John was wrong

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again
Dong work for Yuda
Dong, Dong
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again
He said Dong
was Wong
And Wong was Kong
And Dong was Gong
`N John was wrong

Father Riley B. Jones:
John`s got a sausage
Yeh man
John`s got a sausage
Yeh man
John`s got a sausage
that`ll make you fart
John`s got a sausage
that`ll break
your heart
Make you fart
And break your heart
Don`t bend over
if you are smart
He took a little walk
to the weenie stand
John`s got a sausage
Yeh man
A great big weenie
in both his hands
John`s got a sausage
Yeh man
He sucked on the end
`til the mustard squirt
He said, "Ya`ll stand
back `cause you
might get hurt"

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again
John`s got a sausage
Yeh man

Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again
He said Dong
was Wong
Wong was Kong
Kong was Gong
`N John was wrong

Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
Make way for the
iron shaschige

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
I need a dozen towels
so the boys can take
a shower

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
Bartender, bring me
a colada and milk

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
Well, on second thought,
make that a water...
HtO

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
Falcum...
Take me to the falcum!

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
I wave my bags
Did you wave your`n

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
Well how much
did they wave?

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
Ah`m almost two
kilometers tall

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
This girl must be
praketing richcraft

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Bald-Headed John:
Don`t worry about
the faggot
I`ll take care of
the faggot

Former Execs:
Sorry John
Sorry better
Try it again

Try it again,
Try it again
Try, try, try again...
etc., etc., etc.

Bald-Headed John:
Your Pomona is
very extinct...
Yeah, I studied with
the Dong of Tokyo
`N also with the
oriental Kato...
My body contain
uh water
I just loves the way
these Copenhagens
talks!
Driver, McDoodle...
Sausage
Salima
Salami
That looks like that
stuff that Freckles
lets out
Once a mumfth...

Remixes

Release History

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0000-00-00

1978-02-07: Nouvel Hippodrome, Paris, France

1. Dinah-moe Humm (6:04)
2. Introduction
3. Wild Love (4:10)
4. Camarillo Brillo (3:25)
5. Dancin' Fool (4:00)
6. Yo' Mama (9:04)
7. Muffin Man (5:52)
8. Peaches En Regalia (3:20)
9. Titties 'n' Beer (5:51)
10. Black Page #2 (5:36)
11. Torture Never Stops
12. Watermelon In Easter Hay (4:58)
13. Jones Crusher (3:02)
14. Tryin' To Grow A Chin (3:57)
15. City Of Tiny Lights (9:35)
16. Little House I Used To Live In (9:52)
17. Baby Snakes (1:50)
18. Sheik Yerbouti Tango
19. A Pound For A Brown (5:58)
20. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
21. Bobby Brown (2:58)
22. I Have Been In You (7:57)
23. Envelopes (6:27)
24. Flakes (6:26)
25. Broken Hearts Are For Assholes (5:54)
26. Disco Boy (4:02)
27. King Kong (includes Uncle Meat)

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0000-00-00

1978-02-15: Deutschlandhalle, Berlin, Germany

1. Intro (0:52)
2. Wild Love (4:10)
3. Dancin' Fool (4:00)
4. Yo' Mama (9:04)
5. Peaches En Regalia (3:20)
6. Titties & Beer (6:24)
7. The Black Page #2 (2:48)
8. The Torture Never Stops (14:04)
9. Jones Crusher (3:02)
10. Tryin' To Grow A Chin (3:57)
11. City Of Tiny Lites (5:34)
12. The Sheik Yerbouti Tango (15:11)
13. Baby Snakes (1:50)
14. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
15. A Pound For A Brown (5:58)
16. Bobby Brown (2:58)
17. Boutique Girl (10:01)
18. Envelopes (6:27)
19. Drum Solo (2:44)
20. Flakes (6:26)
21. Broken Hearts Are For Assholes (5:54)
22. Dinah-moe Humm (6:04)
23. Camarillo Brillo (3:25)
24. Instrumental (9:18)
25. Muffin Man (5:52)

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0000-00-00

Apocrypha

1. Lost In A Whirlpool (2:46)
2. Magic Fingers (2:36)
3. Suicide Chump (9:06)
4. The World's Greatest Sinner (2:27)
5. Do It In C (1:45)
6. Gypsy Airs (1:51)
7. Nite Owl (2:14)
8. Studebaker Hoch (6:09)
9. Anyway The Wind Blows (3:45)
10. Heavy Duty Judy (4:41)
11. Interview (26:42)
12. Some Ballet Music (6:33)
13. Fountain Of Love (2:18)
14. Pick Me, I'm Clean (3:33)
15. Rdnzl (4:12)
16. The Jelly (2:13)
17. Deseri (1:51)
18. Inca Roads (9:43)
19. Teenage Wind (3:07)
20. The Revenge of the Knick-Knack People (6:25)
21. Harder Than Your Husband (2:33)
22. Spontaneous Minimalist Composition (2:01)
23. T'mershi Duween (1:54)
24. The Story of Electricity (2:22)
25. Bamboozled By Love (3:04)
26. Metal Man Has Hornet Wings (2:59)
27. Sinister Footwear (26:08)
28. Stink Foot (3:59)
29. Duck Duck Goose (2:54)
30. Falling In Love Is A Stupid Habit (1:44)
31. I Was a Teenage Maltshop (6:25)
32. The Black Page (2:05)
33. The Purple Lagoon (4:03)
34. This Is My Story (1:21)
35. While You Were Art No. 1 (7:18)
36. Whiskey Gone Behind (1:19)
37. Mondo Hollywood (1:54)
38. Son of St. Alphonso (4:03)
39. Whipping Post (6:27)
40. Black Napkins (4:36)
41. Clowns On Velvet (5:54)
42. Sandwich Song (1:43)
43. Frogs With Dirty Little Lips (2:21)
44. Heidelberg (3:52)
45. How Could I Be Such A Fool (1:58)
46. Agency Man (6:45)
47. In France (3:55)
48. The Squirm (6:03)
49. Broken Hearts Are For Assholes (5:54)
50. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
51. Randomonium (1:23)
52. Lumpy Gravy (dialog outtake) (0:45)
53. Moe's Vacations/Black Page (7:07)
54. Texas Medley (9:05)
55. I'm the Walrus (3:43)
56. In Memorium, Hieronymus Bosch (5:02)
57. America The Beautiful (3:15)
58. In the Sky (2:29)
59. Remington Electric Razor (0:57)
60. Directly From My Heart To You (5:52)
61. Twinkle Tits (10:19)

2005

Ave Maria!

1. Intro (0:52)
2. Dancin' Fool (4:00)
3. Peaches En Regalia (3:20)
4. The Torture Never Stop
5. Tryin' To Grow A Chin (3:57)
6. City Of Tiny Lights (9:35)
7. Baby Snakes (1:50)
8. Pound For A Brown (15:11)
9. I Have Been In You (7:57)
10. Flakes (6:26)
11. Broken Hearts Are For Assholes (5:54)
12. King Kong (23:11)
13. Wild Love (4:10)
14. Yo' Mama (9:04)
15. Tities N' Beer
16. Black Page #2 (5:36)
17. Jones Crusher (3:02)
18. Little House I Use To Live In
19. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
20. Bobby Brown (2:58)
21. Envelopes (6:27)
22. Drum Solo (2:44)
23. Disco Boy (4:02)
24. Dinah-moe Humm (6:04)
25. Camarillo Brillo (3:25)
26. Muffin Man (5:52)

November 2010

Hammersmith Odeon

1. Convocation / The Purple Lagoon (2:18)
2. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
3. I Have Been In You (7:57)
4. Bobby Brown (2:58)
5. Dancin' Fool (4:00)
6. Flakes (6:26)
7. Broken Hearts Are For Assholes (5:54)
8. Envelopes (6:27)
9. Peaches En Regalia (3:20)
10. Punky's Whips (10:53)
11. Terry Firma (4:10)
12. The Torture Never Stops (14:04)
13. Disco Boy (4:02)
14. Titties 'n' Beer (5:51)
15. Tryin' To Grow A Chin (3:57)
16. Audience Participation (3:32)
17. City Of Tiny Lites (5:34)
18. King Kong (23:11)
19. Baby Snakes (1:50)
20. The Black Page #2 (2:48)
21. Watermelon In Easter Hay (4:58)
22. Dinah-moe Humm (6:04)
23. Jones Crusher (3:02)
24. Pound For A Brown (15:11)
25. Camarillo Brillo (3:25)
26. The Little House I Used To Live In (8:52)
27. Muffin Man (5:52)
28. Black Napkins (4:36)
29. San Ber'dino (5:57)

1979

Joe's Garage

1. Joe's Garage (6:10)
2. Catholic Girls (3:52)

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0000-00-00

Joes Garage Acts 1 2 3

1. A Token Of My Extreme (4:29)
2. Catholic Girls (3:52)
3. Crew Slut (7:05)
4. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
5. He Used To Cut The Grass (8:35)
6. Joe's Garage (6:10)
7. Keep It Greasy (3:35)
8. Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up (5:25)
9. On The Bus (4:32)
10. Outside Now (6:58)
11. Packard Goose (7:26)
12. Stick It Out (3:20)
13. Sy Borg (8:56)
14. The Central Scrutinizer (2:50)
15. Why Does It Hurt When I Pee? (2:47)

25 September 2012

Joe's Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3

1. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
2. The Central Scrutinizer (2:50)
3. Joe's Garage (6:10)
4. Keep It Greasey (3:10)
5. Catholic Girls (3:52)
6. Outside Now (6:58)
7. Crew Slut (7:05)
8. He Used To Cut The Grass (8:35)
9. Fembot In A Wet T-shirt (4:44)
10. Packard Goose (7:26)
11. On The Bus (4:32)
12. Watermelon In Easter Hay (4:58)
13. A Little Green Rosetta (8:16)
14. Why Does It Hurt When I Pee? (2:47)
15. Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up (5:25)
16. Scrutinizer Postlude (1:35)
17. A Token Of My Extreme (4:29)
18. Stick It Out (3:20)
19. Sy Borg (8:56)

02 May 1995

Joe’s Garage: Acts I, II & III

1. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
2. The Central Scrutinizer (2:50)
3. Joe's Garage (6:10)
4. Keep It Greasey (3:10)
5. Catholic Girls (3:52)
6. Outside Now (6:58)
7. Crew Slut (7:05)
8. He Used To Cut The Grass (8:35)
9. Fembot in a Wet T‐Shirt (4:45)
10. Packard Goose (7:26)
11. On The Bus (4:32)
12. Watermelon In Easter Hay (4:58)
13. A Little Green Rosetta (8:16)
14. Why Does It Hurt When I Pee? (2:47)
15. Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up (5:25)
16. Scrutinizer Postlude (1:35)
17. A Token Of My Extreme (4:29)
18. Stick It Out (3:20)
19. Sy Borg (8:56)

18 December 2012

Joe's Garage Acts I, II & III

1. The Central Scrutinizer (2:50)
2. Joe's Garage (6:10)
3. Catholic Girls (3:52)
4. Crew Slut (7:05)
5. Wet T-shirt Nite (5:26)
6. Toad O Line (4:18)
7. Why Does It Hurt When I Pee? (2:47)
8. Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up (5:25)
9. A Token Of My Extreme (4:29)
10. Stick It Out (3:20)
11. Sy Borg (8:56)
12. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
13. Keep It Greasey (3:10)
14. Outside Now (6:58)
15. He Used To Cut The Grass (8:35)
16. Packard Goose (7:26)
17. Watermelon In Easter Hay (4:58)
18. A Little Green Rosetta (8:16)

1979

Joe's Garage Acts II & III

1. A Token Of My Extreme (4:29)
2. Stick It Out (3:20)
3. Sy Borg (8:56)
4. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
5. Keep It Greasy (3:35)
6. Outside Now (6:58)
7. He Used To Cut The Grass (8:35)
8. Packard Goose (7:26)
9. Watermelon In Easter Hay (4:58)
10. A Little Green Rosetta (8:16)

19 November 1979

Joe’s Garage: Acts II & III

1. A Token Of My Extreme (4:29)
2. He Used To Cut The Grass (8:35)
3. Packard Goose (7:26)
4. Stick It Out (3:20)
5. Sy Borg (8:56)
6. Watermelon In Easter Hay (4:58)
7. A Little Green Rosetta (8:16)
8. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
9. Keep It Greasey (3:10)
10. Outside Now (6:58)

2009

The Torture Stops For You

1. Intro (0:52)
2. Dancin' Fool (4:00)
3. Peaches En Regalia (3:20)
4. The Torture Never Stops (14:04)
5. Tryin' To Grow A Chin (3:57)
6. City Of Tiny Lights (9:35)
7. Baby Snakes (1:50)
8. Pound For A Brown (15:11)
9. I Have Been In You (7:57)
10. Broken Hearts Are For Assholes (5:54)
11. Flakes (6:26)
12. King Kong (23:11)
13. Wild Love (4:10)
14. Yo' Mama (9:04)
15. Titties 'n' Beer (5:51)
16. Black Page No.2
17. Jones Crusher (3:02)
18. Little House I Used To Live In (9:52)
19. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
20. Bobby Brown (2:58)
21. Envelopes (6:27)
22. Drum Solo (2:44)
23. Disco Boy (4:02)
24. Dinah-moe Humm (6:04)
25. Camarillo Brillo (3:25)
26. Muffin Man (5:52)

0000-00-00

Titties And Beer

1. The Illinois Enema Bandit (9:45)
2. My Guitar Wants To Kill Yo' Mama
3. Tryin' T' Grow Me A Chin
4. You're An Asshole
5. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)
6. Sinister Variations
7. Titties & Beer (6:24)
8. Le Serviette Noir (Black Napkins Parts 1, 2 & 5)

2008

You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore (Silver)

1. Chunga's Revenge (7:44)
2. Drafted Again (3:46)
3. Cosmic Debris (3:04)
4. Keep It Greasy (3:35)
5. Tinseltown Rebelion (3:42)
6. Outside Now (6:58)
7. Honey, Don't You Want A Man Like Me? (4:26)
8. Pick Me, I'm Clean (3:33)
9. City Of Tiny Lights (9:35)
10. Easy Meat (8:12)
11. Ain't Got No Heart (2:28)
12. The Torture Never Stops (14:04)
13. Zoot Allures (9:56)
14. Mudd Club (3:10)
15. Magic Fingers (2:36)
16. Stick It Out (3:20)
17. Cosmik Debris (7:43)
18. Dead Girls Of London (2:29)
19. Shall We Take Ourselves Seriously? (1:45)
20. Broken Hearts Are For Assholes (5:54)
21. Dumb All Over (4:03)
22. Suicide Chump (9:06)
23. Jumbo Go Away (3:46)
24. Envelopes (6:27)
25. Introduction
26. Dong Work For Yuda (2:56)