Rancho: (after indirectly making Pia break up with her fiancee) Come on, help us. My friend's father is very ill!
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: Go away!
Rancho: Come on! You are almost a doctor! What is that oath you take... oh yes, Hippocratic oath - I will help a fellow patient, I remain a member of society with special obligations etc.
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: (Reluctantly allows him to get up on her scooter) Okay.
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: (Later when Rancho is speeding with the scooter, with the patient and Pia on the back, towards the hospital) You crashed my sister's wedding, you broke my engagement, for you my Dad keeps taking blood pressure tablets... and I am helping you? Hippocrates screwed us Doctors!
Machine Class Professor: Why are you back?
Rancho: Sir, I forgot to take something...
Machine Class Professor: What?
Rancho: Instruments that record, analyse, summarise, organise, debate and explain information; that are illustrated, non-illustrated, hardbound, paperback, jacketed, non-jacketed; with foreword, introduction, table of contents, index; that are indented for the enlightenment, understanding, enrichment, enhancement and education of the human brain through sensory route of vision - sometimes touch.
Machine Class Professor: (confused) What are you trying to say?
Rancho: Books sir! I forgot to take my books.
Chatur Ramalingam aka 'Silencer': Sir: Machines are any combination of bodies so connected that their relative motions are constrained, and by which means force and motion may be transmitted and modified, as a screw and its nut, or a lever arranged to turn about a fulcrum or a pulley about its pivot, et cetera; especially, a construction, more or less complex, consisting of a combination of moving parts or simple mechanical elements, as wheels, levers, cams et cetera.
Rancho: (At Pia's sister's wedding) Hi.
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: (a little surprised, as she doesn't know him) Hello.
Rancho: I have a free advice, would you try?
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: (Still smiling) What?
Rancho: (Takes her drink away) Let me hold this first, else you may later throw it on me. Leave this guy.
(Points at his fiancee)
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: (Now angry) What?
Suhas: (Meanwhile her Fiancee, speaking to somebody else a little far away) Look at this coat. Yes, its quite costly, 50K.
Rancho: Look at him. He is a moving price tag! He will always keep you reminding of price of every single object he bought. Your life will become a supermarket!
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: (Extremely angry) Excuse me. Who the hell are you? You don't know anything about him.
Rancho: Oh, you need a demonstration! Okay, watch me, he will tell his shoe's price in a second, without anybody even asking him!
(He pushed a waiter, who was carrying a green gooey chutney. The chutney fell on Suhas's shoe)
Suhas: (shouting) You idiot! What the hell! This shoe cost me 10K!
Rancho: (Repeatedly said throughout the movie) Aal izz well
Viru Sahastrabudhhe: (Angrily looks for Raju in the class) Raju Rastogi?
Raju Rastogi: (a drunk Raju stands up from the last bench of class... and shouts) Yes, sir!
Viru Sahastrabudhhe: How does an induction motor start?
Raju Rastogi: (Raju looks around smilingly and then shouts) Vrrrrommmmmm. Vrrrrrrrooom.
Rancho: Pursue excellence, and success will follow, pants down.
Farhan Qureshi: (after finding out Rancho topped their exam) That day we learned, when your friend flunks, you feel bad, when he tops, you feel worse.
Farhan Qureshi: Today my respect for that idiot shot up. Most of us went to college just for a degree. No degree meant no plum job, no pretty wife, no credit card, no social status. But none of this mattered to him, he was in college for the joy of learning, he never cared if he was first or last.
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: (Now that everyone knows, Rancho's real surname is not Chhanchhad) Thank God, after marriage my name wont be Pia Chhanchhad!
Raju Rastogi: So what is your actual name?
Rancho: Phunsukh Wangdu.
Farhan Qureshi: What?
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: (Thinking of her future name) Pia Wangdu?
Rancho: (to Raju & Farhan) Phunsukh Wangdu.
Farhan Qureshi: Phunsukh Wangdu? Silencer's Phunsukh Wangdu?
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: I don't want to be named Pia Wangdu!
Rancho: (to Raju & Farhan) Yes.
Pia V. Sahastrabudhhe: Can I keep my name after marriage?
"Adarniya sabhapati mahodaya ...atithi vishesh shikshan mantri shri R D
tripati ji ..maanyaniya shikshagan aur mere piyaaare sahpatiyo ...aaj
agar I.C.E aasmaan ki bulaaandiyo ko chhu raahaa hai ..to uska
shreya sirrf ek insaan ko jaata hai Shri Veeru sahastra buddhe
..give him a a big hand ..he is a great guy really you are
Peechle buttis saal se inhone nirantar is college mein balatkar pe
balatkar kiye .........umeed hai aagey bee karte rahege ..hami to
aashcharya hota hai ki ek insaan apne jeevan kaal mein itni balatkar
kaisi kar sakta hai ..........inhone kadi tapaasya se aapne aapko is
kaabil bunaya hai ..waqt ka sahi upyog ghante ka purna istemaal koi
inse seeke ..seeke inse seeke ....
aaj hum sab chaatra yaha hai ..kal desh videsh mein fail jayenge
..waadaa hai aapse jis desh mein honge waha balatkar karenge I.C.E ka
naam roshan karenge ...dika (dikha) denge sabko jo balatkar Karne ki
shamtaa yaha ke chaatro mein hai wo sansaar ke kisi chaatro mein
nahiii ....No other chaatra No other chaatra
Adarniya mantraji namashkar aapne is sansthaan ko wo chees di jiski
hamein sakht zaroorat thi ...Stan ..stan hota sabi ke paas hai ..sab
chupa ke rakte hai ..detaa koi nai ...aapne apna stan is balatkari
purush ke haat mein diya hai...ab dekiye yeh kaisa iska upyog karta hai
Is swarn awsar par ek shlok yaad aa rahe hai......uthmam dadddad
padam..Madhyam padam thuchchuk thuchchuk....kanistham thudthudiya
padam..sud sudi pran katakammm !!! aaaha"
- Chatur Ramalingam (Omi Vaidya) (hindimoviedialogues.blogspot.com)